Bread And Blood Tests

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Bloodstone… please go and visit Marje at mjmallon.com to read more about it in “The Curse Of Time Book One – Bloodstone”

Regular readers might remember I have had a couple of awful go-arounds with upset stomachs, nausea, headaches and so on. Tired of feeling vaguely unwell most of the time, I saw my doctor, who pointed out I might actually have some form of gluten intolerance, coeliac disease or IBS, something like that.

I was upset. I have acknowledged the existence of certain “trigger” foods, like mayonnaise, cheese and chocolate (and potatoes although I think I may have made that one up because I don’t really like potatoes and I’m too afraid to tell my mother after the Brussels Sprouts Incident) but I do eat a fair amount of bread and biscuity stuff.

Passing me the tissues, my doctor, a lovely man, reminiscent of Omar Sharif playing Dr.Zhivago, told me I really would be better off knowing rather than carrying on feeling pukey all the time… Clutching my blood test sheet and a prescription for tablets to make things stay where they should, I trotted off, thinking I could coincide my blood test with a mission to chase up my partner’s latest hospital appointment.

We decided to go the next day and set off… “I don’t really want a blood test…perhaps we should leave it… it’s quite late… I feel sick…” I offered my usual round of excuses. My partner replied quite firmly:

No, this was your idea, you need to go and get it over and done with.”

I subsided, muttering.

At the hospital, I was appalled to find there was practically an hour and a half wait. We took a ticket and thought we would use the time to pop to the ENT department for my partner’s appointment. That took about twenty minutes and when we returned I was horrified to find out only three more numbers had been called, still leaving about thirty people in front of me.

I hate waiting for things like this and my dentist knows that if she doesn’t see me within ten minutes of my appointment time I will chicken out and lose my nerve and I will run out of the surgery… I whined a little more, to no effect, so I went to the toilet. In the Ladies, of course, not just where I was standing…

When I returned to my partner, I found an older lady had very kindly given him an earlier ticket, since someone had given her theirs. I thanked her, really appreciating the gesture as it shaved another eight people off my waiting time. However, for the moment, I had to wait, sitting on the seat, swinging my legs, much to the annoyance of the lady sitting next to me who sighed and shifted impatiently in her seat… making me take some perverse pleasure in her obvious irritation and swinging my legs faster in the manner of a petulant child…

As you may have gathered, I don’t like blood tests… Eventually my number was up – I mean called, and I entered the room. It was… surreal.

The room was obviously very clean, with blue padded couches stationed around it, with strategic armrests and it was entirely staffed by small blonde women wearing glasses and red tunics. They were conversing in hushed tones about who was finishing at what time and gestured me towards a couch.

I was the only patient in there. Even though four people had gone in before me. Without coming out. Distantly I wondered why red tunics? and then it came to me. In case someone had a …spillage. Eugh.

I meekly gave my details, proffered my forearm, closed my eyes, gritted my teeth and gripped the other armrest. Then my phlebotomist touched me on the shoulder and whispered confidingly I could go and remember to ring my doctor in three days’ time for the results.

I looked down at my arm where a little cloud of cotton wool had been delicately taped to my arm with a strip of tape… then I leaped off the couch and shot out the door – the same one I came in – shouting “Thankyouverymuch!” over my shoulder as I left.

Surreal. As I said.

Later that afternoon, I went to see my mother, who had very proudly baked me a loaf of bread… and very good it was too!

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43 thoughts on “Bread And Blood Tests

  1. I hope the tests will show everything is alright. I don’t wish it to be gluten as a cause as breads are yummy. Could be an adverse reaction to a new medication you are on perhaps? I too face ghastly long waits when taking my folks for their doctor’s appointments. It is traditionally 2 hour waits and if lucky within an hour.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Give ita think through as my dad had a cough that would not go away and it was traced to a hypertension drug. Check if your symptoms started when you were put on a new drug. I hope all goes well and you can trace it.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. You even make going to the doctor entertaining…. such wit! I hope the tests find something completely benign so that you can go on enjoying your breads and biscuits (but something simple so that the gyppy tummy will GO AWAY.) The Brussels Sprouts Incident….. Reminds me of a movie titled, I think, “If it’s Tuesday, It Must Be Brussels”, which my brother and I always perverted into If it’s Tuesday, It Must Be Brussel…. sprouts!” We were weird. We liked them. I still do! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You like Brussels sprouts….oh dear…unless perhaps they taste differently over there lol!! (Marshmallows maybe?)

      But yeah, I got the results on Friday and all the things like coeliac disease etc were negative, so it’s looking like it could be an allergic reaction. Just a matter of finding out what now….:) xxx

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      1. My mum introduced them as little, baby cabbages. I was young. I was enchanted. I was easily led astray.
        I hope figuring out the allergy proves easier than it sounds. Be well, my dear. xoxo

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Oh no! Please tell me you didn’t fall for the “and broccoli is little trees..” con!!

        Just a process of elimination now…and you too, look after yourself. Lots of love to you 😺💕xxx

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  3. I could feel the anxiety and be with you in this one. If you don’t mind me saying your writing is seriously getting better and it was pretty flipping good before!

    Blood tests… bah, hate them myself. Waiting about and wondering if the annoyance at that might skew the flipping results.

    Does have allergy hallmarks though in what you say. They can be dreadful things to nail down though. Anything new you’ve used or eaten?

    Fingers crossed for you x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Nope, nothing new… just a process of elimination at the moment until I can get back to the doctor. The results were clear for anything like coeliac disease etc. Cheese is a definite no-no….found myself watching cheese porn on Instagram the other day…
      And thank you very much xx

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      1. At least they have ruled out some things then. Cheese I tend to avoid too. Cholesterol and such like. Although pizza now and then I simply can’t resist!

        Difficult though, elimination processes can be terribly frustrating. I hope you’ll keep me updated though xx

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      2. Bah… I love pizza… but now it’s bad for me it makes that worse lol. Low fat yoghurt, semi-skimmed milk, decaf coffee…what’s longevity for then ???

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      3. Hmm, seems to be a lot of dairy angst going on. Do you take milk? It’s not a lactose thing is it? #questionmaster.

        But coffee? You’ve not drink coffee? Oh dear….says decaf person 🤔

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      4. Good lord you must be the only writer I know that hasn’t got a coffee caffeine diet lol. Or, in my case, decaf 🤔

        Might be worth asking the GP to do a lactose test. Can’t hurt and will rule in or out an obvious one maybe x

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      5. The latter are just too expensive nowadays though. As for tea, I don’t drink a lot of that these days. The odd camomile. Ever since I cut back on caffeine really. Bah…. 🤕 x

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      6. My mother still smokes – I had to buy some for her the other day £8.25!!! They’ve gone up since I stopped, and that was one of the cheaper brands too…
        I have never tried camomile tea…smells a bit like wet straw… 🙂 xx

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  4. Glad to hear you do not have the gluten thing. My daughter in law has that and I am slowly learning how to make some delicious foods that she can eat.
    Have you ever had your gall-bladder checked? That can do some nasty thing to your digestive system also. Certain foods can also set that off.
    I hope they figure it out soon for you so you start feeling better.

    Liked by 1 person

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